i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
Randomize
