you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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