I'm really into asian looking animals
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
Randomize
