My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
Randomize
