i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I swear she didn't look like that last week.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
