it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Randomize
