Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize
