First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
Randomize
