I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
Just took my morning after pill in the library
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
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