Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
fuck your aforementioned shoe
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize