Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Randomize