I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
Randomize
