Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
