It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Randomize
