He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
Also. After puking outside of the bar last night, some guy (who saw me puking) said I looked like Jennifer Lawrence, called me J Law, got my number and is now texting me. Who knew puking and rallying would do me any good
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
Randomize
