i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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