ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Randomize