If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
She's the barista slut.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
no more duck duck goose at the bar
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
