Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
