rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
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