So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
where does the pee come out of this thing
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
