wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
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