it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
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