i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
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