It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
Randomize