Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
Randomize
