whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
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