i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
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