Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(405): View more from Oklahoma

Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?

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(404): View more from Georgia

Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.

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(433): View more from

There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables

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(352): View more from Florida

we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.

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(302): View more from Delaware

Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.

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(870): View more from Arkansas

God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz

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(606): View more from Kentucky

I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.

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(334): View more from Alabama

ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it

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(813): View more from Florida

All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.

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