I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
Randomize
