He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
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