After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
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