You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
Dick very happy bro
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
Randomize
