She's JV to your varsity
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon�
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Randomize
