idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
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