yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
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