people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
