your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Randomize
