I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
Randomize
