how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
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