you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
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