New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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