GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
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