They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
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