I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
you were so drunk you tried to use the microwave as a calculator for your BAC
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Randomize
