it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
