I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
