remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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