I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
I just found puke in my bra..
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Randomize
