after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
